The Difficult Times

Jekyll and Hyde. Angel and the devil on your shoulders. Call it what you want, that's how I feel at times when dealing with the bipolar. Even with medication, you can't always avoid being triggered by something. Unfortunately, my husband and I seem to trigger each other more often than I'd like to admit. This was hard before and with a child in the mix, it's a bit more of a struggle.

As I've gone through my day today, I've been fighting this battle inside my head. Both sides trying to emerge as I try to keep my patience with a teething baby, a sweet girl who just needs my love. I managed and fought hard. I think the day ended up being a draw but, I fought and dug myself out of the pit. Not an easy feat, but, I did it.

Grateful that tomorrow is a new day. I get to reset the clock and remind myself of what's important. For me, it's doing the best I can to not let the damn bipolar get the best of me. It's keeping focused on my daughter and letting her know that I love her regardless of the storm that rages in my head from time to time. It's being patient with myself and trying to keep my cool. It's continually reminding myself that I'm not the worst mom ever. There's always something to deal with.

So, here's to a new day. To continuing to put one foot in front of the other. To the power of music and the ability it has to lift even the most conflicted of spirits.
Keep pressing forward, everyone. We'll get through things one way or another. Don't give up.